How to Love Someone You Can't Stand

How to Love Someone You Can’t Stand
Romans 12:14-21
A Living Sacrifice
Romans 12: 1-2
Devoted in Brotherly Love
Romans 12:10-13
Problems from relationships …
Grieved over a perceived wrong by someone they were once close to … now have bad feelings …
People aren’t your problem…
Ephesians 6:12 For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.
See the evil instead of the person …
Evil is often found in the context of someone you know who continues to sin against you …
Satan can use a bad relationship to tempt you to sin.
Can be done by believers …
Matthew 18:21-22 Then Peter came to Him and said, "Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times?" 22 Jesus said to him, "I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.

Romans 12:21
Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.
Can you get out of trouble and still win?
“The real test in golf and in life is not keeping out of the rough, but in getting out after we are in.”
Respond proactively …
2 Corinthians 10:4 For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, …
1 John 4:4 You are of God, little children, and have overcome them, because He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world.
Good will win over evil …
History bears out that good is more powerful than evil …
How to Love Someone You Can’t Stand
Romans 12:14-21
Romans 12:14
Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse.
Those who persecute you ? …
May come from enemies of the church
Where we are wronged most frequently …
– In the family ..
– At work ..
– With friends ..
– Even in the church …
Cursing or Blessing ? …
Say bad things about another person to God … Psalm 55:15
Say bad things about someone to other people
Say bad things to the person who wronged you
Say good things to God about that person .. Pray for them … Luke 23:34; Job 42:10
Say good things about this person to other people
Say something good to the person you can’t stand
How to Love Someone You Can’t Stand
Romans 12:14-21
Romans 12:15-16
Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep. Be of the same mind toward one another. Do not set your mind on high things, but associate with the humble. Do not be wise in your own opinion.
Walk a mile in their shoes …
“Seek first to understand, then to be understood”
– Experience on subway with father and children running wild …
Share the highs and lows of people’s lives …
Weddings, birthdays, funerals … sharing emotions and empathizing … John 11:33-35
We have many friends we can laugh with, but really close friends are the ones we’ve cried with …

Understand their thinking .. understand their position
Be of the same mind toward one another. Do not set your mind on high things, but associate with the humble. Do not be wise in your own opinion.
How to Love Someone You Can’t Stand
Romans 12:14-21
Romans 12:17
Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men… 19 Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, "Vengeance is Mine, I will repay," says the Lord.
Vengeance is not your job …
Deuteronomy 32:35 Vengeance is Mine, and recompense; Their foot shall slip in due time; For the day of their calamity is at hand, And the things to come hasten upon them.'

Saul, David, Absalom …
Saul threw spear at David .. but David didn’t throw a spear at Saul
God took care of Saul .. God took care of David
How to Love Someone You Can’t Stand
Romans 12:14-21
Romans 12:18
Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men.
Decide ahead to do what is good and honorable …
12:17 (RSV) Repay no one evil for evil, but take thought for what is noble in the sight of all
1 Thessalonians 5:15 See that no one renders evil for evil to anyone, but always pursue what is good both for yourselves and for all.
Live at peace with everyone if possible …
The goal is not to win the war, but to turn your adversaries into allies ..
– Matthew 5:9 Blessed are the peacemakers, For they shall be called sons of God.
– Romans 14:19 Therefore let us pursue the things which make for peace and the things by which one may edify another.
If it is possible, as far as it depends on you…
Proverbs 16:7 When a man's ways please the LORD, He makes even his enemies to be at peace with him.
1 Corinthians 7:15 But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace.

How to Love Someone You Can’t Stand
Romans 12:14-21
Romans 12:18
Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, "Vengeance is Mine, I will repay," says the Lord. Therefore "If your enemy is hungry, feed him; If he is thirsty, give him a drink; For in so doing you will heap coals of fire on his head."
Don’t take God’s place …
Hebrews 4:13 And there is no creature hidden from His sight, but all things are naked and open to the eyes of Him to whom we must give account.
Psalms 147:3 He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.
Heap good on them…
Find a need and seek to help meet it
– If hungry or thirsty, feed him or give hm a drink …
– Everyone needs love … both words and action
Coals of fire may refer to shame
– Goodness has the power to expose and shame the one who did harm …
How to Love Someone You Can’t Stand
Romans 12:14-21


How to Love Someone You Can’t Stand
Romans 12:14-21