Two Guys and a Girl

Pete wants to break up with his girlfriend Melissa because he doesn't think, ""she's the one""; however, just as he's deciding against it, Berg tells Melissa.

Pete, who has a big presentation to make in front of the museum board, might have accidentally swallowed an overdose of an allergesic Berg is testing out.

Pete and Berg, who feel neglected by Sharon since she has a new boyfriend, plan to sabotage her relationship.

Pete, a huge Boston Celtics fan, is extremely jealous of Berg when Berg gets to sit on the bench with the Celtics. Berg tries to cheer him up by ""borrowing"" the Celtics championship banner.

Berg and Sharon make it their business to interview possible future tenants when a vacancy opens up in their building. Pete tries to figure out what to get Melissa for their one-year anniversary, and Berg has a severe emotional reaction to his latest experimental product.

Berg and Pete start a co-ed baseball team in order to meet more women. Bill, being their sponsor is led to believe that team is actually good and challenges one of his competitors to a game.

Berg sets Pete up with a patient at the hospital called Lauren in an effort to get Pete over his recent breakup with Melissa. It's only when Pete starts to really like her and starts calling her ""The One"" that Berg finds out she may not have long to live. It turns out though that Lauren is not dieing, but she does live in Colorado. In the end, Pete is glad that he's been dumped by Lauren because it made him forget about Melissa which means he's ready to start dating again.

Berg throws 24 year-old Pete a fake 30th birthday party so he can meet a woman he's had a thing for years. Meanwhile, Sharon awaits a call back from a guy she really likes, unaware that he already has.

Berg and Sharon set Pete up with a girl they find listed in the personal ads, but she soon makes it clear she won't let anyone come between them, even to come in Berg's bedroom at night with a baseball bat.

Berg gets suspicious of Pete when he always want's to deliver the pizza to 845 Arlington. So Berg makes the delivery for a change and discovers that it's a gorgeous artist who paints with her nude body that's been making the orders. This leads Berg and Sharon to believe that Pete is cheating on Melissa with her.

Pete and Berg reflect on their college days when Bill asks them how come neither of them was ever romantically involved with Sharon.

Pete is trusted to keep the fact that Berg's dad has quit his law firm to become a caricaturist in the park from Berg and that Berg is no longer in law school from Berg's father.

Pete and Berg fight back against their landlord when he goes over the edge with the rules for living in the building.

When Berg notices he's no longer first in his class he goes out to find who is. He finds out it's a beautiful female co-ed, so he tries to get her get drunk so she won't be able to study for the test the next day.

Sharon decides to quit her job but her boss tells her to think it over in Aruba. She decides to bring Pete and Berg along, but problems arise when Pete has a last minute job interview that seems to go on forever. They are then delayed when Sharon must answer questions from reporters at a press conference when her company dumps thirty thousand gallons of toxic waste in Chesapeake Bay. More problems arise for them when Berg has a medical emergency to attend to. They end up missing their flight to Aruba and partying at Beacon Street Pizza.

Pete has a new girlfriend, problem is Berg had a one night stand with her three years ago. He doesn't plan on telling Pete until Pete tells him that their going to spend the night at a Bed & Breakfast. It seems that she got Berg's name tattooed on her ass. Berg sends Sharon into the locker room at her gym to see if the tattoo is still there. It is and now all the women at the gym think she's a lesbian. Berg ends up telling Pete and Pete doesn't care cause he likes her too much.

It's homecoming and Pete and Berg plan to get luxury box seats to the homecoming game to upstage some old college friends. The get them just before the game starts but they're counterfeit so they busted. They escape the security room and get busted again. This time they go to jail. Also Sharon tells her ""friends"" that her boyfriend is a music executive and he thinks she's embarrassed of him cause he's only a jukebox repairman. But then she thinks he's embarrassed of her when she finds out he told his friends she's a stripper.

Pete has to choose an elective course. He chose metallurgy but when Berg brought his course choice card in he changed it for a course in sports broadcasting. At first Pete's mad at Berg but soon learns to enjoy it. Also Sharon tries to prove that her boyfriend isn't dumb.

It seems as though Berg has lost his mind when he goes on a murderous rampage. The victims (1) Tim, (2) Johnny, (3) Mrs. Himmelfarb, (4) Ashley, (5) Cop, (6) the real Berg (by Pete), (7) Sharon and (8) Pete. However, Berg is innocent it's actually an impersonator that turns out to be Mimi from The Drew Carey Show.

Pete gets an internship thanks to Ashley but gets fired when he's caught having sex with the boss' daughter, Ashley's sister.

Pete, Berg and Sharon get invited to the wedding of one of Pete's ex-girlfriends. Pete wants to reveal to the groom that she's only marrying him because she wants to get married, but he doesn't. Ashley finally reveals her true feelings for Berg but she tells him that she has a boyfriend at Oxford.

When Berg finds out that Ashley went to visit her boyfriend at Oxford he flies all the way to England to be with her. It turns out it is Oxford, Mississippi. Ashley's boyfriend says he'll move to Boston so they can stay together. Pete and Johnny get jobs as limo drivers. Berg and Ashley finally kiss.

Sharon and Johnny want to start a new Thanksgiving tradition and be alone. But plans change when Pete's grandpa comes down unannounced and Berg invites Ashley and her boyfriend Justin. Berg and Pete both hate Justin. Berg and Justin both compete for Ashley's love but she apparently dumps both of them. While trying to break Ashley and Justin up Berg almost ends up breaking up Sharon and Johnny.

Pete enlists the help of a TV love guru to help Berg and Ashley when Berg calls Ashley to tell her that he thinks they shouldn't see each other anymore. She doesn't take very well and breaks down and cries. And for Sharon and Johnny because Sharon is jealous of Johnny's friend Sean when she finds that Sean is a woman.

Pete embarks on a new relationship with an older woman who has a 10-year old son. Sharon is having trouble organizing an office Christmas party and it's only 4 days till Christmas. Berg is having trouble with one of his older patients who doesn't seem to like him.

Pete is put in charge of watching Michael after school which is fine, until he asks Berg to do it for a day. Berg brings Michael to the dog track to help him learn his fractions. Sharon asks Johnny to move in with her.

When Sharon uses an embarrassing underwear ad that Berg had posed for four years prior, for a contest he goes to great lengths to get one of her. Pete realizing he has no parental rights with Michael because he's just the guy dating the mother asks Kaitlyn to marry him. She refuses on the basis that they've only known each other a month and tells him that they should take a break from each other for a while.

When Sharon is up for a new job she learns she never graduated college. When she goes to verify she learns that she hadn't paid her $210 of parking tickets. She had given the money to Pete and Berg so they could go and pay them for her but they had to bail her father out of jail. So she pays the tickets but finds out that the requirements have changed and she needs to retake freshman English. When she puts two and two together she thinks that instead of paying her tickets they had bought a $200 bottle of champagne but later learns the truth, which is that the money she had given them to pay the fines was actually used to bail her father out of jail, after he caused a drunken ruckus due to his recent bankrupcy and the fact that he had just lost his job. The champagne that Pete and berg had was actually a gift from a girl they had never met before

Pete gets a new extremely peppy best friend, Sharon sets Berg up with Sean so she'll stop seeing Johnny but Sean is secretly in love with Johnny which leads Sharon and Johnny to break up. Sharon and Pete share a passionate kiss at the end of the episode.

Berg falls in love with a TV newswoman and goes right in the eye of a huge storm just to ask her out. She agrees but just right after she leaves Berg and Pete's apartment Ashley shows up to tell Berg that she broke up with Justin because Berg's the one she wants.

Ashley comes back and tells Berg she dumped Justin to be with him. Berg now has quite a dilemma, choose Ashley the woman he's been chasing for months or Vanita a woman he's just met. He wants to choose Vanita because he thinks he has a better chance with her. So he dumps Ashley but she won't let go she follows him to the restaurant where he has a date with Vanita and ends up breaking them up. Johnny and Sharon get back together.

Berg gives Ashley a key to his and Pete's apartment without telling Pete. Pete doesn't like because he hates Ashley. Ashley doesn't find out that Pete hates her until Sharon tells her. Now Ashley won't talk to Pete, Sharon won't talk to Ashley because Ashley said Sharon has a big mouth. But they all find someone to blame for this, Johnny. You see Pete went to talk to Sharon and Johnny and Sharon got mad at Johnny for mentioning Shawn's name again so she went upstairs and Ashley was there. Sharon told Ashley Pete hates her and when Pete asked who told her that she said that Sharon told her because Sharon has a big mouth. Berg gets the whole thing settled though. Berg becomes a ringside fight doctor but gets fired when he tells the fighter that he should call it quits because he has extreme brain damage.

Berg is suspicious that Ashley might be posing nude for a professor. Johnny's four sisters and three of them are pregnant. Berg delivers a baby.

Pete quits his job at the pizza place and tries his hand at psychiatry. The job doesn't work out but he lands a job as a career counselor after he gets his career counselor a better job. It seems he can get a job but for other people. Ashley and Sharon start hanging out together and reveal secrets about Berg.

When Johnny tells Pete and Berg that he wants to marry Sharon Pete feels his time to tell Sharon how he really feels about her is running out. Johnny proposes but Sharon just runs out.

Sharon can't seem to give Johnny an answer at first but eventually comes out with ""Yes, in theory"" as it's obvious she's not sure about marrying him but doesn't want to hurt his feelings. Pete flies to Paris to get away from everything and gets hit by a car driven by a beautiful French woman that he later starts dating, even though she can't speak a word of English.

Pete returns from France with a new girlfriend, the woman who ran him over. He thinks he's in love with her until he finds out she a racist. Berg feels old when a new employee calls him sir. He quits his job at the pizza place. Sharon realizes she really wants to marry Johnny.

Pete fears Johnny is trying to kill him. Berg and Ashley start their residency and Berg feels one of the doctors is riding him too hard.

Ashley's ex-husband plays a prank on Berg by making him believe that Ashley used to beat him. Pete tries to get Sharon a new job and in anticipation she quits her old job before finding out she didn't get the job.

Sharon and Johnny fight over wedding plans, Berg and Ashley also fight and Pete runs into a crazy ex-girlfriend.

A mad scientist switches Pete's brain with Ashley's brain and Berg's brain with Sharon's brain and the only who can help them is Johnny.

Sharon and Johnny compete with another couple to get an opening date for their wedding. Ashley bribes Pete so she can move in.

Berg and Ashley spend the weekend at his parents place to try and spice up their relationship. Pete introduces Sharon and Johnny to the Kama Sutra.

Ashley invites a hobo over for Thanksgiving dinner and he gets the whole gang fighting with made up stories. Ashley moves in with Sharon and Johnny.

Ashley moves in with Johnny and Sharon and Johnny keeps walking in on her in various stages of undress. Pete learns that his grandfather only has six months to live.

Sharon and Johnny move to the basement because it's cheaper but when Sharon discovers that Johnny has over 23 thousand dollars in the bank she wants to stay. Johnny refuses to go back up because he says that that's his life savings and that he wants to buy a house. Ashley gets a new roommate but Berg scares him away to get even at her for scaring away a nurse he was trying to get a phone number from. Pete is afraid to pick up a package that came in the mail for him because Irene is holding it for him.

Ashley has a New Year's Eve party, and Berg manages to get Robert Goulet to sing at her party after treating him for an ear infection. When Goulet learns that he cannot fly to the destination where he is doing a gig, Berg siezes the opportunity. But he has to work that night, so he swaps with another doctor who Ashley has a crush on, and she thinks he did it intentionally. Johnny tries to get out of a romantic evening with Sharon to hear Robert sing, he says that his dead grandfather used to sit him on his lap when he was a kid and play some of Goulet's songs. Pete invites Irene to the party and she surprises him by acting normal. He even starts to fancy her, but Goulet moves in on his gal before he can get anywhere with her. To be a nice guy, Berg goes back to the hospital and swaps back his shift with the English doctor that Ashley likes. Ashley goes to the hospital to thank him and they end up having sex on a hospital bed.

Sharon and Ashley get drunk and in her drunken stupor Sharon asks Ashley to be one of her bridesmaid's, but regrets it when sober. Pete, Johnny and Berg go to a laundromat/bar and Pete tries to meet a woman but blows it by Johnny's slugs (fake quarters), Johnny uses fake quarters and gets caught and Berg gets his clothes stolen.

Sharon and Johnny discover a hidden room in their apartment, which contains a TV monitor that is hooked up to every apartment in the building. Berg and Ashley get back in the dating swing. Pete discovers that Irene has been taking his stuff and making a dummy of Pete.

Pete searches for a woman he slept with only to find out she's getting married and he was her last one night stand. Ashley gets her arm stuck in the garbage disposal while trying to fix it herself and Sharon goes shopping for wedding dress on sale.

Pete gets angry with Johnny for selling him a broken toaster. Berg gets jealous when Ashley starts dating baseball superstar Nomar Garciaparra so he enters a bachelor auction to compete with him.

Everyone at the hospital is making fun of Berg for his actions at the bachelor auction so he tries to regain their respect by working nonstop until he almost kills a patient accidentally. He's suspended from the hospital for that. Sharon volunteers to read to children at the hospital and Pete becomes a volunteer fireman.

Pete and Ashley get mugged while waiting for the subway, Sharon and Johnny have trouble writing their wedding vows, Berg is afraid he might screw up at the hospital again when he's called in to replace a sick doctor and Irene's dad visits.

Pete, Berg and Johnny share bad stories about women.

The guys at the firehouse make Pete believe that Marty has a thing for him. Pete, Berg and Sharon decide to hang out at O'Malley's, their old college hangout, just like old times since Johnny is having his bachelor party but Johnny shows up anyway and Berg gets mad at him for ruining their evening and punches Johnny right in the face.

The guys at the firehouse find Pete's make-up bag and the fire chief asks Pete to give his daughter a makeover. In hopes of getting off probation at the hospital Berg lends his apartment to his superior so she can take a nap but she has an affair instead. Sharon has a tea party and Pete and Berg's invites members of the hospital but the wrong ones show up first and they think that she's running a prostitution ring.

Sharon gets jealous when Johnny helps his friend Shawn with her Lamaze class, Pete is mad at Berg when he goes out with Marti because Pete wanted to go out with her and Germ suspects Ashley of stealing hospital supplies.

Sharon and Johnny get joint checking accounts but Sharon makes all the important choices, Pete is stressed when Marti gets into fireman boot camp before he does and they admit to each other that they like each other, Berg is depressed so he visits his parents only to discover that his mom threw his dad out because he cheated on her.

Irene throws Sharon and Johnny a wedding on the roof after Sharon cancels some of the plans, Pete and Marti go off to fireman boot camp and Berg and Irene hook-up.

A bear mauls Pete and he thinks Marti doesn't care for him when she doesn't rush to go see him. Berg and Irene try to keep what they did after the wedding a secret but they end up sleeping together again. Johnny shows Sharon the house he bought for them and it's in serious need of repair. Nomar breaks up with Ashley because of something Pete told him.

Berg feels like he's treating Irene like a piece of meat. Pete gets his fireman's badge. Johnny plans to christen the new house but Sharon keeps finding an excuse. Nomar wants to get back together with Ashley but she doesn't want to. Johnny sees Berg and Irene doing it.

Johnny confronts Berg and Berg convinces him not to tell Sharon. Sharon finds out and she tries to use it against Johnny but he keeps his promise to Berg and tells her that it Pete and Ashley that are sleeping together. Nomar is thinking of leaving Boston because of Ashley so an unruly mob sets up outside their apartment building and harass her. Marti convinces Nomar to stay.

When Pete, Berg and Sharon won't let Irene watch scary movies with them she puts a curse on them. The next day Pete has Ashley's head grow out of his shoulder, Berg becomes ugly and Sharon wakes up with up with a penis.

Germ acts as a marriage counselor for Johnny and Sharon. Sharon wants Johnny to hurry up and finish the house so she hires a carpenter to help him but he wants to do it himself. Marti breaks up with Pete and leaves him for Nomar.

Pete tries to locate a woman he saw on the subway, Johnny tries to fix Ashley's bathroom plumbing and he has to turn off the building's water supply, which leaves Berg with a head full of shampoo. A dog follows Sharon home and she has him lick the dishes clean but he accidentally eats her wedding ring. Ashley refuses to give up her seat on the subway to a pregnant woman so four pregnant women hound her.

Pete, Berg and Johnny try to get into a club but end up drinking beer outside a convenience store, after Jonny complains about the price of the beer in there. When they return later to the club with Germ none of them are allowed in, except for Germ. They then go back to to the convenience store but end up getting arrested for drinking in the street. Sharon finds out that Johnny doesn't wear his wedding ring and goes out with Ashley to the club to try and help Ashley find a man, and for Sharon to find Jonny so she can kill him. But they end up having a great time and get piles of phone numbers from single guys.

Berg and Irene decide to go on a date to see if they could an actual couple and not just sex buddies but when Iren sees Pete sad she asks him out instead. They go to dinner and Berg tags along but Irene dumps Pete. Johnny doesn't like all the time that Sharon is spending with Ashley.

There's water coming into Berg and Pete's apartment because of a broken valve in Ashley's bathroom so Berg goes to sleep at Sharon and Johnny's and Johnny realizes he's not ready to be a father. Pete asks Irene if he can stay at her place but she takes that as meaning that he's obsessed with her.

Sharon is caught on tape saving a man's life, so Berg and Pete try to save someone's life.

Johnny and Sharon's new house burns down.

Berg's mother falls for Pete but they keep it from Berg.

Pete finds out about Berg and Irene; Berg finds out about Pete and his mother and Sharon find out the money that Johnny made in stock market.

Pete's affair with Berg's mum affects the two guys friendship.

Pete accidentally cuts the tip of his finger whilst making a salad and trying to apologise to Berg for sleeping with his mother. Berg takes him to hospital via taxi, as he says it will be quicker than ambulance or bus. But when they get out of the taxi, Berg leaves the finger behind and spends most of the day trying to find it. But it turns out that Pete is playing a trick on him, as he wants Berg to accept his apology. Berg accepts the apology thinking that Pete's finger is long gone but Pete had it the whole time. Ashley gives a reluctant Johnny a psychlogical test for a project, and ends up getting some very intresting insights. Meanwhile, Sharon gets a job as the assistant of a crooked lawyer, and only realises when they claim $30,000 for a man who ""lost the use of his legs"". But she keeps the job in attempt to clean his illegal ways

Johhny wants to become a fireman.

Berg tells Irene that he loves her and she doesn't say it back. Berg takes this to mean that she is no longer intrested in him and ends up going to a comic book convention, where he meets a girl from his high school who was fat and ugly and was also obsessed with him. She believes that it was their destiny to meet, especialy after they meet again at the hospital. Berg starts to think that this girl is better for him than Irene. Pete and Ashley go to the movies, both pretending that they are waiting for dates, but end up having a great time with each other

Berg sets up a secret romantic rendezvous.

Berg tries to woo Irene so she'll take him back, Pete agrees to be Ashley's date at a hospital mixer where she wins a residency at Stanford in California, Sharon and Johnny spend their anniversary at the fire house when Johnny has to work.

Pete has a near death experience and he believes that he and Ashley are meant to be together. Ashley has a dream about Pete so she goes to talk to him and they end up sleeping together. Berg wants to see if there can be anything between him and Katie and he discovers that she's been stalking him for eight years. Irene won't take Berg back because now she's seeing her mailman.

A jealous Berg tries to get Irene back but ends up screwing it up again, as he won't leave her alone and keeps on having conflicts with Roger, her new mailman-boyfriend. Pete tries to convince Ashley to stay by spending more time with her and making her a picnic in the park, but he gets stood up becuse Ashley doesn't want to get involved with pete as she's moving, and it will end in heartache when she does leave. Johnny wants to spend more time with Sharon, so he helps Sharon serve a subpoena to a man who has a scary dog, and they spend the day together trying to get through the garden to his letter box

When Sharon is late she thinks she may be pregnant so she makes Ashley take a pregnancy test with her, Berg tries to get a urine sample from Irene because he thinks she may be pregnant too when he finds out the glow in the dark condom they used was defective.