A courteous murderer wins a suspended sentence by virtue of his charm; a search for Paris by way of Iceland is interrupted by a plane crash and a shipwreck. Also: how to dispose of pets before going on vacation.

A couple investigate the cultural similarities between two London districts, seven miles apart; schoolboys' extracurricular activities are examined; a TV farming club comments on Tchaikovsky.

"The Money Program" features a Swiss banker, a city accountant and a song of praise.

A program called "Blood, Devastation, Death, War and Horror," featuring a man who speaks exclusively in anagrams; a timorous TV announcer, before and after he undergoes psychiatric treatment; the employment of "pantomime horses."

Contestants in "The All-England Summarize Proust Competition" are judged in swimsuit and evening-gown categories; an irate customer confronts his travel agent. Also: an expedition to Mount Everest, made by an international group of hairstylists.

Surgical tools applied to a mildly anesthetized patient include a power drill and a mallet; a TV program features a lecture on gastropods, highlighted by the visit of a whelk.

A climbing expedition negotiates a hazardous London road; an attempt is made to determine whether an urban dwelling is a house or a lifeboat. Also: a mouse's quest for cheese, which leads to the production of a Western called "Rogue Cheddar."

Mr Pither; Clodagh Rogers; Trotsky; Smolensk; Bingo-crazed Chinese (British Ambassador); 'Jack in a Box'.

A housing project induced by hypnosis stands---as long as the tenants believe in it. Also: highlights of the Olympic Hide-and-Seek finals; suggestions for improving bullfighting, such as the use of radar.

A police investigator is mistaken for Sir Philip Sidney in a Tudor-period job agency, which actually deals in pornography; King Solomon judges the case of a stray bee; a panel of dead people debates the question "Is There a Life After Death?"

A highwayman steals "lupins" from the rich and tries to give them to the poor. Also: the first episode in a tatty, tedious 18th-century serial is brought to a screeching halt; peasants clamor for Titian paintings and Venetian glass.

'A Book at Bedtime'; 'Red Gauntlet'; Kamikaze Highlanders; No time to lose; Penguins; BBC pro-gramme planners; Unexploded Scotsmen; 'Spot the Looney'; Rival documentaries; 'Dad's Doctors'; Dad's Pooves'.

Oscar Wilde, James Abbott McNeill Whistler, George Bernard Shaw and the future Edward VII exchange epigrams at an evening party; mechanical brain surgery fails to dramatically affect a woman's mentality.